How to go about asking/finding out if parent of your child's new friend smokes around them?

My daughter has a best friend @ daycare and we just got the #. This past weekend my bf/her dad went and met them @ a park. The little girls dad smokes, but we don't know if he does it around his kids. My daughter isn't in a household where someone is smoking EVER. I also don't want her smelling like it when she comes home. How do I go about finding out/asking? And letting him know I would prefer him not to when my daughter's around if he does?How to go about asking/finding out if parent of your child's new friend smokes around them?
I am a smoker, do not smoke in my house my car or anywhere around my child. Just come out and ask them, we smokers no thats it not good to smoke around children. I would never take that as an insult. Just make me think that you are a good mother worring about her child. If they get mad or refuse there not the type of parents you would want around your child anyways.How to go about asking/finding out if parent of your child's new friend smokes around them?
You can't control what someone does in their own home, as dangerous as second hand smoke is, he already knows that, but may not care. In any case, I would just ask. If he gets upset about it, then too bad, it's your daughter's health that is number one here, not an inconsiderate friend.
Just like you did here. You say ';I noticed you smoke. I would prefer it not be done around my child.'; Pretty simple. They wont get offended and will understand. Most smokers know it is bad so they are open to not doing it around children. Good luck
I would just come out and ask. I would choose my words carefully to be sure that I don't offend them but just politely let them know that you don't smoke and prefer it if your daughter wasn't exposed to it
i would say.. just to let u know we have a strict rule its no smoking in our home and we dont mind if ppl smoke we just dont want our children in same room as it.... that way ur sticking to ur rules and saying nicely dont smoke around my child
What's wrong with just asking him?
Just ask him and tell him you'd rather him not smoke around your child...I'm sure he'll understand
I just wouldn't send her with them, unless you go along. No one can take care of your little ones as well as you can, and I think if you try to talk to this man about his smoking, it might cause drama.





This is the reason my kids don't go to their grandma's house, and she just Does Not Get It. I don't care if she blackens her lungs, but she's not hurting my kids with her nasty habit. :-(
I am a smoker, i do not however smoke around my children unless they come outside while I am smoking. I will not smoke around any ones child if they ask me not to. I let parents know before their children come over that I smoke and make sure there is no problem. If there is a problem I will try to fix it. If they can't get over me smoking outside then don't send the kid. I know it sounds harsh but if I do what they ask then they should accept it. Smoking doesn't make a bad parent. I would just talk to him, ask if your child were to go over could he keep it away from your child. I wouldn't worry about it until the time comes though. Even parents who smoke around their children (in home and car) are willing to back off while someone else children are there. It's very easy and shouldn't cause any problems what so ever.
just bring it up in calsual conversation, and just be straight forward and honest.... I hate smoking and would never allow my children to be around it, the only way to know is ask, just be like I noticed you smoke and do you do it around your children cause you would not like your child exposed to this
Like the last poster replied just ask. Hey Joe I noticed you smoke, I would really appreciate it if you didn't smoke around little Ashley when she comes over.


Be prepared to accept the fact that you might have to meet in the park or outside. It is his house and even if he agrees to not smoke around her if hes smoking in the other room she still might come home smelling like smoke. But he might tell you he only smokes outside or is trying to quit.


Bottom line its your kid, shes only in preschool now but this will be an issue for many years to come. Learn to take this step now before it becomes even more important- Ashley wants to come to the party will there be parents there? do you allow drinking? etc.